Currently feeling so nervous I cannot even sleep but also.. like.. proud of myself I think?
Went to a job interview today, and did pretty good at talking / appearing confident. Like I think I won my social anxiety / whatever you call the fact I am scared of going to the uni and meeting people and be myself.
So, went there and showed them what I can do. I am a graphic designer and that’s a pretty creative job, so I’m always telling myself I’m not good enough and I’ve not enough imagination and such. BUT I WENT THERE AND FUCKING STOOD UP FOR MYSELF.
And now I’m here thinking fuck fuck fuck what if they actually want me to work there and what if I’m not good enough will they laugh or get angry and will I feel like shit?
Why can’t I even enjoy the fact I just did good.
I won. I freaking won. They liked me. Fuck the rest and fuck tomorrow and the uni and the fact I already feel like shit again. I’m the boss.
my heart if frozen solid
Got my very first job interview today.
Freaking out right now & forever.